On Thu, 10 Jul 2008 22:53:36 +0200, Gail Shaw wrote:

> "Jim Henderson" <nos### [at] nospamcom> wrote in message
> news:48767560$1@news.povray.org...
> 
>> Don't be worried.  My point is *you'll get there*.  But you also have
>> to make incremental changes.  I'm a *totally* introverted person most
>> of the time, but I took a teaching job 6 years ago.  Be willing to take
>> chances.  If it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.  No big deal. 
>> If it does work out, hey, that's great.  That's how we learn and grow.
>>
>>
> I was totally introverted about 6 years ago. Terrified of speaking to
> strangers, wouldn't even contemplate any form of public speaking. I
> can't pinpoint a single event that changed it, or started a change, but
> now I'm preping to speak at the largest Tech conference in SA, and I'm
> looking forward to it.

That's something that I started doing back in about 1998 - speaking at 
conferences.  I've got a good friend from Ireland who also was an 
instructor - he describes himself as an "extroverted introvert" when he's 
teaching.  It's actually a very common trait amongst technical 
instructors, it seems.  Surprisingly more common than one might expect.

I think for me the "turning point" started on board a cruise ship in the 
Bahamas (with the group of Novell SysOps I was with - the group that's 
similar to the Microsoft MVP group) drinking margaritas, and a couple of 
the guys came over and were giving me grief about something; I turned and 
said something to them that was *totally* unexpected (and apparently 
quite forceful), and the world didn't end.  None of us remember *what* I 
said (I even asked one of them recently when he reappeared on the scene), 
but the effect was pretty immediate.

I *always* have had problems speaking my mind.  It's taken me many, many 
years to get to the point where I'm comfortable expressing a dissenting 
opinion.  Now I do so regularly - and I've been having to train a "new" 
boss (as of last November) on the idea that dissenting opinions aren't 
bad, they're necessary.  I believe she understands that, and I've 
explained to my whole team that because I'm an "IT geek", I may sometimes 
say things that can be taken offense to, but it's not intended that way.  
Ever.  Or rather, when it is, it'll be *really* obvious.

That said, I tend to be extremely cautious in how I word things to my 
teammates.  I've had a few comment that they've never seen me act rude 
towards anyone - and one just the other day said she can't picture me 
being mean or rude to *anyone*.  I certainly can, I just reign it in, 
especially when I'm talking to a group of non-geeks who don't understand 
that I filter inbound rather than outbound.  (The so-called "tact 
filter").

> That said, if I;m at a party and don't know anyoen, I'll stand in the
> corner sip on a drink and stare at the ceiling.

Same here.

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